Thursday, 18 January 2018

Life | The Year of the Threenager

I always knew the terrible twos were going to be difficult, you hear about it all the time. From relatives and friends to strangers in the street. It is completely normal when your toddler starts to assert their independence but what about the year of the threenager? Nobody ever warns you about that. By definition, a threenager is a three year old with the attitude of a teenager. So how do we deal with this?

George turned three in September and since then I've noticed a huge change in his behaviour and he is pushing boundaries like never before. Nobody prepared me for this. His attitude stinks worse than one of Henry's leaky. teething shits and I am just about ready to rip out my own hair. My once happy boy can now be extremely solemn at times, not to mention the foot stamping and the growling.

The "Thinking Step" doesn't work because he thinks it's funny. Telling him off sternly won't work because he either lashes out or hisses. Seriously, what's with the hissing? I am at my wits end with him already and still have another nine months of this shit! He refuses to listen properly making up words in response to anything I say. He has also started dropping the letter 'T' from words and that in itself is enough to make me want to strangle him. I'm sure he does it all the more because he knows how much it annoys me.

If you though two year old tantrums were bad just wait until your three year old screams and cries for fifteen minutes because he can't have a packet of sweets at 6am. Just this morning he sat on the step sulking because I wouldn't let him have a snack bar before breakfast. I served him the porridge he eats almost daily only to be met with "this porridge tastes disgusting. Bleurgh!"

Not that I am wishing his life away but this is a stage I cannot wait for him to grow out of . Even his teacher in pre-school has pulled me up on his behaviour, she wants to speak to the SENCO about maybe introducing a reward chart for him because he doesn't fear any consequences.

Here's to all you parents surviving the year of the threenager!

Rachael xo

Wednesday, 17 January 2018

Family | Why I Could Never Be a Stay At Home Mum

When George was eight months old my maternity leave had finally come to an end and the time had come for me to return to work. I remember vividly the night before, I was emotional and cuddled him to sleep. I didn't want to leave him every day, I was racked with guilt even though I knew I was leaving him in good hands. My request for flexible hours was denied and I was miserable. Fast forward a year, I left that company, unknowingly fell pregnant with Henry and started a new job of which I thought there were part time hours available. Alas, I was informed the job would be full time but I ended up enjoying it there and didn't mind too much.

I found out I was pregnant with Henry a month after I had started my new job and panicked. I had gotten so used to being a working mum, my first thought was childcare. I know, pretty selfish right? See, we were incredibly lucky in the fact both my sets of grandparents and my dad provided childcare for George but with my grandparents getting older it would have been so unfair to expect them to look after two babies.

Eventually, albeit reluctantly, I came to terms with the fact I might have to find a part time job to work around the kids. Ideally, I wanted something early morning that would fit in with Pete's working hours and I could spend my afternoons with my boys. I was adamant this was what I wanted. The perfect balance between work and family.

That was until Henry arrived of course. Balancing a newborn and a toddler was far more difficult than I expected. I longed for a break, time on my own. If you thought getting out the house with one kid in tow, try it with two! I was soon back on antidepressants because my mood quickly deteriorated.

I was upset, angry and resentful. I had practically given up a job I was finally happy in after two years of misery and many more of temporary positions. I yearned for the routine of getting up, dressed, going to work with nothing but a handbag.

See the thing is, I am just far too selfish to be a stay at home mum and I appreciate my boys far more when I have had that little bit of time away from them. I also like earning my own money, drinking a cup of tea while it's still hot and having actual grown up conversations. I like the fact I am not constantly relied on and can actually sit on my arse without getting up every ten minutes.

I admire those parents who do stay at home with their children and those who want to. I actually got to return to work in September for two full days a week as Pete went self employed and I find that to be the perfect balance for us. The boys get to spend time with both their parents and also Pete and I get to be someone other than mum or dad.

How about you? Could you be a stay at home parent?

Rachael xo

Thursday, 4 January 2018

Life | Goals for 2018

Although it may be a cliché, each year I try to set myself goals then reflect on them at the end of the year. It's not something I did last year due to being absolutely exhausted from being so heavily pregnant. This year in an attempt to become more organised, I am starting again. My plan is to actually write down my goals on paper this time to remind myself of them and therefore mark them off as I complete them. The motivation is real.


I started lesson in the summer so I am absolutely desperate to pass my test now, especially so I can take the boys places when we're off in the Spring/ Summer and Pete is working. I just can't wait to have that freedom of being able to take them places.


I really want to improve my writing skills because it's something I love doing and in order to do that I need to create more content for my blog. My blog is a year old now and I definitely should have bashed out more than 50 posts by now.


There's nothing I love more than seeing gorgeous Insta photos and beautiful blog photos and it makes me want to brush up on my own skills so I can capture pretty images of the boys.


It wouldn't be a complete list of goals without this one right? Last year I joined Slimming World but left right before Christmas. I have slowly gained the pounds since then so I am determined to shift them.


We have lived in our house for three and a half years and it is still unfinished and untidy but we're getting there slowly. By this time next year, I want the entire house to be immaculate and finished. Well as immaculate as can be with two toddlers running about!

My list of goals is short but sweet and I living in the hope that by keeping it this way they will be more achievable. Cannot wait to review them at the end of the year! Wish me luck!

Do you have any goals this year?

Rachael xo

Monday, 1 January 2018

Life | 2017 Roundup

2017 was the year we welcomed our second baby into the world. The baby I was so unprepared for, our little surprise. Adjusting to life as a mum of two was something I found incredibly difficult mentally, therefore 2017 was the year my mental health took a dramatic dip.

No sooner was Henry born I was back on my antidepressants. There was a certain time in particular when Pete and I had a really bad argument, I snapped and walked out of the house. I've screamed, I've shouted, I've cried and I have threatened to leave my fella more times than I can count.

Despite all of the above, I've actually had an amazing year minus the blips. I gave birth to another gorgeous baby boy and watched my toddler grow and develop into the most incredible and loving big brother ever. Watching them bond and play together every day melts my heart. George can make Henry belly laugh like nobody else and I cannot wait to watch them become best friends as they grow.

My best friends and I got together for the first time in forever and we drank all of the wine and ate all of the pizza, even if it did end up with me becoming absolutely smashed and falling asleep in a club and crying in the toilets. Yes, I was a mess.

One of my closest friends and I went to Cardiff, ate all the sushi, shopped and drank all of the cocktails to celebrate an eight year long friendship and reminisce about our gig days in one of our favourite cities. We sat in the park and chilled on the Sunday and it was so nice just to gossip and catch up.

I had the opportunity to visit Amsterdam, not once but twice and never have I fallen in love with a city so much. The place is so beautiful and completely different to what I expected, every building is so pretty and I basically laughed the entire time I was there on both occasions.

We had our first holiday as a family of four. We stayed in a caravan near the beach, had BBQs, visited the beach which was literally right behind some dunes next to our caravan and drank cider until our hearts content. Those four days were proper lovely and it was nice to spend some together the four of us.

My best friend got married and I was so proud to be called her Maid of Honour. It was the most perfect day, every last detail was so perfect and of course she looked stunning.

In September, I took my twelve year old brother to meet his all time favourite drag queen which is easily one of my highlights of the year. Watching the two of them interact was so heart-warming and it's something that I will remember forever.

Pete and I watched two of our friends get married in November which was just another stunning day and it was so good for the two of us to do something together without having to worry about being parents for a whole day. I was really drunk (a recurring theme of the year) and danced the entire night away.

December was a bit of a whirlwind but we celebrated Henry's first Christmas and as George is now three, he got to appreciate everything that little bit more so Christmas extra special for us this year. Now I just need to find homes for the hundreds of toys the boys received from the big man.

To conclude, although parts of 2017 were a huge struggle, I still had an awesome year. Here's to 2018, lets make it a goodun.

Rachael xo